I wanted to write about a huge
break through for me, not only as a person, but also as a writer. I typically
don't like writing about my feelings or anything along those lines but I this
week I decided to write my father a letter. My father and I have no relationship
and have not communicated in about a year. I have a lot of built up anger and
chose to express why I was hurt and angry and how he does not need to worry
about me anymore. I do not honestly know if I will send him the letter or if I
did it just for my own mental health but I did feel somewhat better after I
wrote down my thoughts and feelings.
The reason I have chosen
as of now not to send it is strictly because I do not want my siblings to get repercussions
because my father is that way. If he knows they talk to me he will blame them
for our problems and that is not fair to them. Maybe once they are out of the
house or they are old enough to handle their own then I will share it with him.
But until then I am proud of myself for putting my words and feelings on paper
and being honest with not only him but also myself. I plan on leaving the hate
and anger behind and moving forward after today. I am graduating in a year and
have made it without him for the past four years. I can do it for the next one
and then I will show him that I did not fail like he assumed I would. I feel so
much better after showing this and I am glad I finally just did it.
No comments:
Post a Comment